Well the year has come to an end and I must say that it has been quite a wonderful year. I know many of you maybe wondering, "well what in the world did you do?" and the answer to that question is "nothing". I learned how to be content in any situation no matter if its lack or abundance. That is one of my favorite scriptures out of the bible. Paul understood what it took and so do I. There was something I dealt with this year and that was how to maintain a relationship. How to be happy in them and how to honor your partner and encourage them anyway you can. You see, I learned a great deal of things by being "hurt" by my significant other. That hurt did me some justice. I know it sounds strange but I have to look at everything in my life as an opportunity for advancement, growth or just a plain old life lesson.

At what point in a relationship does one person dictate the outcome of the commitment? I thought it was two fold. I thought the idea was to have each person implement their ideas and share their customs and the other person does likewise. Maybe I am confused about how a relationship should function but once again, I am not considered the average woman.

If you give your word about anything and commit to being a part of that thing, then it is your duty to give it your best. Your word is all you have. A relationship is not pay as you go, or you go first then I will see you at the end or let me see what you do and then I will follow suit. If you want the other person to do as you do and put forth the commitment then you should lead by example. Many people will not innately do what you expect them to do, they will do what they want to do. It is the idea of intention that makes us rationalize what we have not done. We can explain what we have done but when it comes to what we have not done, it will be the intention that is the excuse. When it comes to other people, the idea of intention just doesn’t work. We want to know why you did it the way you did it or why you even did it at all. I think that is an unfair requirement, knowing full well that we fall short ourselves. It is pertinent that we do not go around with these impossible expectations and get upset when the people we are involved with don’t meet them. To be honest , most of us wont meet them either. It is perfectly fine to hold people to a higher standard and while we are holding them to that we are to encourage what is on the inside of them. If we would take the time to think before we speak many of the thoughts that are articulated will stay what they start out as………..thoughts! if you cannot give it, don’t require it. I cannot expect for you to love me to the fullest extent and unconditionally if I cannot love you unconditionally. Its not fair to the other person so lets be mindful of the other persons feelings. I am not saying that we must sugar coat everything but it is important that we are considerate of the other persons feelings and make ourselves totally aware of what makes them tick. Speaking the truth is very important and being open is another however, the deliverance of the message is just as important as the message.

When you are in a relationship it is not about self all the time. What’s the point of you always wanting it to be about you if you are in a relationship with someone? We must take the time to enjoy the other person’s interests and they should do likewise. I truly believe that it is an idiosyncrasy on both parts to behave a certain way, or to have the peculiar outlook he or she does.

These are just my thoughts and my ideas of what it takes to create the foundation for an incredible and lasting relationship.